An elf maiden dances on feet of living wood sung into shape, planted in soil and watered when she takes them off. Every year she plants the old ones and sings a new pair. (Incidentally, the pair of peach saplings from three years ago have produced an excellent crop- She makes preserves from them, and despite the inevitable jokes about “toe-jam”, they are appreciated.)
A dwarf king has a metal fist, all tiny gears and fine wires, kept wound by a mischievous mine-spirit bound to the spring as punishment- the more it struggles, the tighter the spring.
An orc chieftaness is regularly asked for the story of how she earned the name Wyrmthrottler- she boasts of how she strangled the dragon that ate her arm, and had her shaman make a new arm from its bones, with its fangs as the fingers.
A necromancer simply re-attached his old leg bones- Sacrificing a few mice each day keeps it going.
A pirate captain lost her arm to a shark attack: a passing selkie saved her, and gave her tattoos of kraken blood. Now she has an arm made of salt-water, that grows and wanes with the tides, and swings a cutlass as well as the original. (She doesn’t sail as far these days though: she doesn’t want her wife to worry.)
A wandering swordsman was broken at the waist- his ancestral armour allows him to walk again, as long as he keeps it polished, and burns incense to the ancestors regularly.
A high priestess has an eye made from a crystal ball- to predict the future, all she has to do is wink.
A bard was struck deaf by illness- he struck a deal with the god of music. Now he wears hearing-trumpets made from his old pipes, and dedicates his every song to the god of music- the better he plays, the better his hearing. (It is said his music could make statues weep, and he can hear a mouse fart at 60 paces.)
A princess has the arm of a golem, enchanted clay with mystic words carved in- her music tutor despairs of how her harp playing has become even worse, but her calligraphy tutor is ecstatic over her handwriting.
A goblin pickpocket has an arm made of whatever he steals- no-one feels his fingers, and even if they did, they couldn’t find their possessions amongst all the rest.
A witch has eyes made from shadow and starlight, given to her in a game with a demon. Nobody dares to ask what she wagered- they aren’t even sure she won.
A warg was born deaf and blind- his people learned of his power when the nearest birds started staring at them, and dogs pricked up their ears as he walked past.
Far better than what has been published for D&D, so yoink away, I say. Yar-har.
Back in the early ‘00s, there was a Monster Manual with options for adding golem limbs to your character – the result clearly intended to be monstrous.
One of the clones of the late wizard Manshoon has a metal gauntlet for a left forearm and hand because the mad wizard Halaster relieved him of his original for inscrutable purposes. Presumably it is animated, but the texts don’t say, and the effect only serves to make him more sinister.
The pragmatic player will ask why you don’t simply seek out a high-level druid and pay for your lost limb to be regenerated. The answer is, because that’s boring. And anyway, maybe the druid doesn’t feel like being a paid monkey. They’re not a cleric, after all. Maybe they’ll set you some task out of a fable or fairy tale, if you’re lucky. This is a 7th-level spell we’re talking about, here.
being into critical role is wild because I don’t have the attention span to watch movies most days but sometimes I randomly remember I’ve watched a bunch of people describe a battle for several hours
THIS. So hard.
We’re at the lowest tax rate in history for the wealthy and they just got a trillion more dollars last year in bonuses.
If you aren’t a millionaire or close to it, you should be wondering why taxes aren’t closer to 94% on that high bracket for the wealthy. You know, like it was in the golden years of the 50s all these rich white people dream of.
